Birstwith Away

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It was an early start for Captain Dalby this week, 12:40 am to be precise when "College Boy" Cook decided Friday nights binge was too much to handle and he wasn't going to make it. The threat of his Mum stopping his pocket money may have also added influence. Another frustration and more ringing round for the disillusioned skipper, Lightie had cried off the day before nursing a fractured necklace, two cracked pendants and a broken ring after taking a tumble in the Glasshouses fixture last week.

Still no luck winning the toss and Blubbs were batting first again on sunny day but with showers forecast.

A new opening partnership walked out to start the days play with Bill Davis being accompanied by Captain "Stonewall Jackson" Dalby.

Blubbs made a good start with Bill reaching his half century in the twelfth over with the score on fifty one, it was looking like another big score was on the cards. Stonewall Jackson was playing his part at the other end with his trusty trowel he'd now got three courses of red brick and one of breeze block between himself and the stumps and nothing was going to get past that in a hurry.

The score had moved on to ninety four when disaster struck and Jones sent down a demolition ball knocking over Stonewall's ornate garden wall and the stumps, breaking the partnership and Dalby's trowel.

New look M C Hammer Craigie kept his regular spot and immediately took about destroying the bowling attack crashing three fours in as many deliveries. He reached twenty in a brisk manner before a gust of wind blew his trousers up in front of his facing causing him to miss one on target bowling him neck and crop with the score one twenty one.

Dicko took the number four slot this week, armed with his Slazenger 9mm he took guard, two balls later he vowed "I'll be back!" when an inswinging grenade trapped him leg before and got his duck count up and running for the season.

Mad Frankie was promoted up the order to five this week, with black cloud looming Captain Dalby wanted quick runs from the Aussie wannabe but the only quick thing this week was his dismissal, skying one up to mid-on leaving Blubbs one twenty eight for four.

Far from "in form" Wilkie nervously walked out next to try stop the rot but only two more runs were added, both by Davis, when Wilkie missed yet another delivery and carried on his duck run making it three out of four, maybe Meatloaf can make a song about that?

Titchie Lowe was in at seven and put on twenty with Davis before getting another dodgy LBW decision and being sent back to the mower shed for three, the collapse continued!

Splinter Hendry went eight and was hungry for runs, unfortunately the umpire was hungry for tea and up went the finger again to another LBW appeal to a ball which clearly wouldn't have hit another set of stumps.

Seven down and it was time to call in the heavy artillery, Sherman to the rescue. Bill reached another magnificent century as he and Sherman added another twenty to the board before Bill was tempted by a Vol-au-vent from Heardie bowling him for one hundred and three.

Number ten was the Blubberhouses answer to Judith Chalmers, Hebb fresh back from his tenth holiday of the year and ready for action, with only two over's remaining the pair saw out the over's to secure the batting point leaving Birstwith one hundred and seventy four to win.

Mad Frankie and Tichie opened up the attack, the air was once again blue as Frankie's LBW appeals were knocked back and the Birstwith opening pair sliced and edged the ball around the field.

Stonewall came into the attack after only six over's and Mad Frankie decided he might have more luck from the the other end. It wasn't long before the re-arrangements did the trick and Frankie skittled Moore for eighteen.

Only five more runs were added when Stonewall knocked the stumps over again dismissing Barnes for four and Birstwith were thirty five for two.

The score reached forty two when opener Nelson crashed one through the covers straight at Sherman, the whole fielding side closed their eyes and looked to the sky, Sherman looked stunned having actually caught the ball.

Wickets tumbled at regular intervals Stonewall and Mad Frankie both snapping up a caught and bowled and Birstwith staring down the barrel of defeat.

Blubbs knew things were going their way when Sherman plucked another catch from the sky and a six pointer was on the cards.

Splinter came on to replace Mad Frankie after he finished another miserly twelve over stint.

Sherman replaced Stonewall and the run rate dropped even further, Birstwith still sixty shy of the batting point. Splinter bowled Moore for eight and the writing was on the wall.

The thirty sixth over started and it was an over that ten of the first team finally found out why Wilkie was in the team, snapping up two miraculous catches at long off in the space of three balls leaving Birstwith seventy seven for nine and the fat lady was starting to sing.

Two balls later and she was in full flow, Heardie tried to cow Splinter out of the park but only succeeded in finding the safe hands of Davis. Game over.

Points Awarded Birstwith:0 Blubberhouses:6

Fielding Points: J Wilkinson, M Lowe

Fact of the day: The local pub in Birstwith is called The Station because it used to be on the railway line which ran "up dale". Another type of station is a bus station which is where you will usually find Mad Frankie after a night on the sauce.

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